Postscript on my recent "Invisible" post:
I go home, act like a freaky jerk to my husband, he thinks I'm mad at him and he can't figure out what he did wrong (since he did nothing wrong), we're weird until finally I cry, explain that I don't know why I'm upset, and then he's really, really nice to me. The end.
In the midst of me finally crying - which I had been needing to do all day - it was revealed to me why I was so upset. *snot-gasp-sob* "I feel like I'm shaming him..." *wah-boo-hoo-snot*. It's amazing how sometimes you need to let yourself break open to discover what the truth is. I've been feeling that, even though of course I have the right to quit my job, it seems like my leaving has exposed to others what really goes on here. I feel like I'm revealing a secret about my boss to the world and that it is shameful. He may be dysfunctional, but he's also been very kind to me, and I guess I feel bad about this. My subconscious is volunteering to torture itself on his behalf to compensate. Healthy!
Also.
This morning I discovered that I have a two hour conference call related to volunteer work that I need to participate in when I am supposed to be on vacation. boo. This is the worst-planned vacation ever. We still have no idea where we're going or what we want to do.
No comments:
Post a Comment